Sunday, April 4, 2010

18 years from now

18 years from now, give or take a year, my son will graduate from high school. Right now, he is a grainy black and white picture, a orange tinted semi 3D blob on a picture that resembles a baby, he is a nudging kick in my abdomen, a pressure on my bladder that makes me cuss under my breath. He is formed, yet in a way so formless. He is open to interpretation, he is not yet of THIS world. He exists, but only because my body supports him. In about 8 weeks he will be his own person, a separate entity all his own, and his life will begin to take shape.

He will be helpless and small, dependent on me and Dan for each and every need, but he will grow. He will learn to talk, to walk, to read and write. He will learn to play, to run, to climb a tree.

I have no expectations of him, I want him to simply be a good person. To do his best in everything he attempts and to treat others with care and respect. No matter what he wants to do, I just want it to be something he loves doing.

Each day I imagine moments with him, chubby baby arms splashing in the tub, him and Dan in the kitchen cooking something, watching him go running off at the park toward the swings. I see these things and know they will happen.

I can't wait to meet him and find out who he is. To get to know the person he will become. I can't wait to watch him crawl and walk, to watch him grow into his own person.

And in time, watch him start his own adventure in life. I can only hope that I do a good enough job that he gets to that point and is able to meet life head on.

1 comment:

  1. In reading this, Jessie, I know that you will. Bless you!


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